Funny Google Searches and Even Funnier Suggestions.
I think that we all know what Google is… Well at least I hope so, especially all of us here in the office at Roundhay Web Design, it would be slightly worrying if some of the staff here didn’t have a clue what it was! So, if for any reason you don’t know then I must ask; have you been living under a rock for the last 19 years, since its launch back in September 1998? For those strange people that don’t know what Google is (although I’m not sure how that’s possible?!) These funny Google searches are something else!
1. Monkeys are Made of Chocolate – Funny Google Search
THIS FUNNY GOOGLE SEARCH IS HILARIOUS.
I don’t know which is the funniest Google search- the suggestion that monkeys are made out of CHOCOLATE or the third suggestion down… If monkeys are made of chocolate then they must be super tasty, mm. Hasn’t anybody seen Family Guy? You seriously don’t need to ask Google if monkeys are evil if you have seen this awesome, hilarious tv show – Chris Griffin knows all too well just how evil monkeys can be; funnily enough they seem to mainly live in closets and have a serious finger pointing fetish!
After watching a disgusting but comical video of a monkey in a zoo protesting by throwing a big lump of poo at an old Granny in a wheelchair; I can confirm the answer to the last Google search suggestion – YES, monkeys ARE jerks!!
2. How to Raise Your IQ by Eating Gifted Children
Won’t Somebody Please Think Of The Children??
That’s one way to increase your intelligence I guess…? By the same standard, wouldn’t eating Google raise your I.Q substantially more? After all, it is the all seeing, all knowing, incredibly smart artificial intelligence. Leave those gifted children alone! Such a funny Google suggestion though, there are some twisted, cannibalistic people in this strange world.
I have never actually took an IQ test, might give one a go later just for a laugh! Imagine if it turned out I was some kind of extremely gifted and talented person hidden behind this awkward, ditsy personality for all these years!? MENSA here I come if that’s the case – I will join the elite groups of smart people!
3. How Come a Cupcake is Not a Mineral – Google why? Lol
Tasty Minerals – Google’s Funny Search Result.
How come people are so stupid? A cupcake will never be a mineral nor will it ever be considered a mineral for god sake! I didn’t realise that cupcakes naturally occurred? While we’re at it – why are cupcakes not fat free? The day some genius invents fat free cupcakes is the day the world will be a better place; not just for us cupcake lovers but for dentists, doctors, health experts alike!
People can gorge on cupcakes or even have a diet solely of cupcakes with no worry – wohoo! We have so much smart technology available to us, we even have self driving cars. Why has technology still not advanced enough to make tasty food healthy? Such a waste. I’m going to make it my life goal to discover and patent calorie free cake – I’ll be a millionaire in no time!
4. What is it Called When a Giraffe Swallows a Toy Jet
Funny Google Giraffe Search
One of life’s great unanswered questions. I wonder what the technical term for a giraffe swallowing a toy jet actually is? Giraffetoyjetia? Answers on a postcard please. There are some other great funny Google suggestions on this one – in fact all of them are equally comical. What is it called when a girl has both parts? Worrying is what it’s called; especially when it’s 4am and you’ve just got home from the club with a hot chick, it comes down to doing the deed and you guessed it… You realise that the she you have bought home is actually a she-he.
Woooops! The lads down at the pub will never let you live this one down!
5. Do Midgets Have Night Vision – Hilarious Google Search Result!!
Super Midget To The Rescue! Funny Google Search.
These Google searches just get better and better. Yeah, midgets do have night vision, it’s one of their superpowers you see. Surely everyone knew that already?! The bottom suggestion is also pretty funny too, midgets do make noises, they aren’t some kind of silent beings. I wonder how many people have felt the need to Google search that question.
6. Can Jesus Microwave a Burrito – No Google, Cos He’s Made Up!!
Jesus Loves Burritos – Funny Google Search.
Remember a few years ago? The big ‘Jesus Loves You‘ phase that came from nowhere in the fashion world? Literally so many t shirts, belts and bags were covered in that slogan, although I’m now beginning to think they got it wrong. It should actually be `Jesus Loves Burritos!’ I’m sure if Jesus was alive today that he would be able to work out how to microwave a burrito but, correct me if I’m wrong, microwaves weren’t invented where Jesus was alive?! That’s some pretty advanced technology if they were.
To answer the bottom suggestion – no. I love that someone has asked if Jesus can fly like he’s some kind of superhero, mind you that would seem alot more feasible than some all seeing, all hearing all mighty God (invisible man) that lives in the sky. I still can’t believe just how many millions of people truly believe that God makes everything happen for a reason. Really? What about all these terrible wars? All these evil people that exist and live amongst us? All the horrific diseases? Why would God make those happen. I call bullshit.
7. Why is my Goldfish Turning Black? Google, You Are Daft!!
Blackfish (No, Not The Documentary.)
Which Google search is funnier?
- Why is my gas bill so high? Well my friend, that’s life I’m afraid.
- Why is my goldfish turning black? It must have been eating too much liquorice, obviously.
- Why is my girlfriend always mad at me? You’re an arsehole and she doesn’t love you – move on.
Answers on a postcard please…
8. Wolves are taking All Our Women – Silly Search Engine lol
Wolves Are… Funny Google Search.
I just can’t believe it, not again. It certainly does like like those bloody wolves are at it again though, coming over here and taking all of our women (and our jobs, our school places, our healthcare services…) No wait, it’s just another far right propaganda tactic to make us turn against wolves! How funny is the second to last Google suggestion though – wolves taking revenge.
I just have a hilarious image in my head of a group of angry wolf vigilantes sat around a table drinking whisky plotting to take revenge against all the people that have wronged them in their lives. Sort of reminds me of this awesome photo!
9. Help I’m a Prisoner in a Toothpaste Factory – This just is NOT funny lol
Too(th) Bad (See What I Did There…)
I bet you would feel like a prisoner working in a toothpaste factory. Did anybody see the newer Charlie and The Chocolate Factory film? The one where Jonny Depp played an extremely awkward, unsettling and weird Willy Wonka? Well, poor little Charlie’s Dad worked in a toothpaste factory (see image above) and I must say it did look like the most boring job ever. And to top it off, the poor guy ended up losing his job due to robots and machines being developed to be much more efficient! Sign of the times eh, so many people are losing their jobs due to much more efficient robots being able to do their jobs for them; both cost and time efficient. I suppose it’s a no brainer for company owners.
10. I accidentally Slept with my Sister – Hmm Not Funny :/
This Calls For Jeremy Vile, I Mean Kyle – Not Vile!
‘I accidentally slept with my sister.’ Yeah of course you did mate, I bet he just tripped and ‘accidentally’ fell on top of his sister, just one big unfortunate accident eh.
On a separate note – I accidentally deleted my recycle bin? Is this even possible? (Note to self – do not try this, you will be thoroughly pissed off if it is in fact possible!) Just like the time I was told wonderful things would happen if I pressed held down the Alt key and pressed the F4 key. Cheers! (Yeah, don’t fall for that and do it like I did – unless you’re a bit of an idiot like me…)
Did You Like This?
I hope you really enjoyed reading this article all about funny Google searches and their even funnier suggestions, some of them are hilarious don’t you think?! Anyway, make sure that you check back for more fun and entertaining articles just like this one! We post a great variety of blog posts on all kinds of subjects; from funny Google searches like this one to more serious articles about SEO and web design topics, but mostly – they are fun and interesting blog posts! Until then, why not check out this funny blog all about the times that the laws of Science didn’t apply in a cartoon, it’s actually pretty funny and will get you thinking, even if it doesn’t it will certainly help pass some time if you’re bored at work.
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